Questions & Answers
Q: What do Viagra And Disney Land have in common?
A: They both cause you to stand around for an hour waiting for a two minute ride!!
Q: What is the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?
A: About 45 pounds!!
Q: What is the difference between a huband and a boyfriend?
A: About 45 minutes!!
Two friends meet each other on the street. “hello! Where are you coming from?” asked Bill. “Oh, don’t ask me! I’m coming from the cemetery. I just burried my mother-in-law” replied Sid. “I’m so sorry!” said Bill, “But why is your face schratched all over?”. “It wasn’t so easy!” said Sid, “She put on a hell of a fight!”
When you ask a housewife, accountant, and lawyer what 2+2 is, what do they give you?
The housewife says “Four.” The accountant says “It’s either three or four, let me run it through my spreadsheet again.” The lawyer closes the shutters, turns down the lights, and whispers “What do you want it to be?”
Q: Why did the blonde crash her plane when landing?
A: “The runway was only 25ft long, but a mile wide”
Q: Why was Phillip’s girlfreind dissapointed?
A: Because she found out that Phillips 24 inch was a television.
Q: What’s the difference between a bitch and a whore?
A: A whore sleeps with everyone at the party and a bitch sleeps with everyone except you.
Q: How are twisters (tornadoes) and marriage alike?
A: They both begin with a lot of blowing and sucking, and in the end you lose your house.
Q: Why is a woman like a Kentucky fried chicken meal?
A: By the time you’ve finished with the breasts and thighs, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in.
“Hey Bill, I heard you can download the whole Tyson-Holyfield fight off the internet”. “No kidding? How much memory will it take up?”. “Not much, just two Bytes.”
I believe in making the world safe for our children. But not our children’s children, because I don’t think chilldren should be having sex.
Sign on a church bulletin board: You aren’t too bad to come in, You aren’t good enough to stay out.